Category: Lists

Very Early 2013 Movie Preview

You should know that I don’t really consider the year over until all four and half hours of the Oscars have aired, so I have no reason to do a 2013 movie preview just yet. There are more than enough blogs with lists that’ll tell you there’s a new “Star Trek” movie coming out or that there are a half dozen superhero sequels and reboots set to clog up the summer.

Frankly I’m more interested in the movies that absolutely no one’s heard of yet, but suffice it to say there are a few already that have piqued my interest. So these are just the movie guy movies that don’t have established fan bases nor require plot speculation. I can be comprehensive next season.

Inside Llewyn Davis – Coen Brothers (TBD)

If you’ve called yourself a film buff in the last 10 years, how could a new Coen brothers movie not by at the top of your most anticipated list? Their new film is a dramatic foray into the world of 60’s folk rock. Oscar Isaac, who you might recognize as Carey Mulligan’s (also starring here along with Justin Timberlake) husband in “Drive,” plays the title character, a New York based producer modeled off the life of Dave Van Ronk.

Watch Oscar Isaac play an old folk staple done by Bob Dylan, amongst others, “Dink’s Song.”

Prisoners – Dennis Villeneuve (September 20)

“Prisoners” is the first English language film from the French Canadian director Denis Villeneuve, who brought us the excellent Oscar nominated drama “Incendies.” “Prisoners” has an absolutely terrific cast including Hugh Jackman, Jake Gyllenhaal, Paul Dano, Maria Bello, Terrence Howard, Viola Davis. The screenplay, however, by the writer of the unfortunate “Contraband” has been on the shelf awhile as it changed casts and directors.

Gravity – Alfonso Cuaron (October 18)

Alfonso Cuaron is supposedly attempting an unbroken take that lasts for 30 minutes in his new sci-fi “Gravity” (who does he think he is, Bela Tarr?) starring Sandra Bullock and George Clooney. If he pulls it off, it’ll be mighty impressive considering that it’s being shot in 3-D.

To the Wonder – Terrence Malick (April 12)

“To the Wonder” was almost universally hated when it premiered at the Venice Film Festival last year and was pushed back to 2013, and frankly, the trailer was edited in such a way that if you were to make a parody trailer of what a Terrence Malick movie looked and felt like, this would be it. If there’s less buzz surrounding it than Malick’s untitled Austin, Texas music scene movie that apparently stars everyone, that’s because “To the Wonder” is a companion piece to “The Tree of Life,” even going as far as to use some of the same footage. Granted, it could still be a masterpiece.

The Wolf of Wall Street – Martin Scorsese (TBD)

Yes, Scorsese pictures with Leo in them are great and all, and this one about a crooked NY stock broker seems to be more up Marty’s ally than “Hugo” or “Shutter Island,” but the big buzz is that the screenplay comes from “Sopranos” and “Boardwalk Empire” creator Terence Winter. It also stars Jonah Hill (could we soon be saying TWO-TIME Oscar nominee Jonah Hill?) and Matthew McConaughey, who is no doubt on a roll.

Labor Day – Jason Reitman (TBD)

Thankfully not another idiotic incarnation of the “New Years Eve” and “Valentine’s Day” movies, “Labor Day” is Jason Reitman’s first real foray into drama. The screenplay is his own from Joyce Maynard’s novel about a depressed woman (Kate Winslet) who offers a ride to an escaped convict (Josh Brolin).

Side Effects – Steven Soderbergh (February 8)

“In some instances, DEATH may occur,” i.e. the best tagline ever. You know Soderbergh, no one is going to believe that you’re retiring if you keep putting out a movie every six months. “Side Effects” is a romance and thriller surrounding a depressed woman (Rooney Mara) and the doctor (Jude Law) providing her prescription medication. It should make for a good thriller, as Soderbergh is working with the same screenwriter behind “Contagion.”

Before Midnight – Richard Linklater (Sundance first, then TBD)

In “Before Midnight,” Richard Linklater is revisiting Jesse and Celine again another nine years after “Before Sunset,” which of course was the sequel to “Before Sunrise” from 1995. Both Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy are now credited writers in what is sure to be another intelligent and improvised character study.

This is the End – Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg (June 14)

I’m always wondering how some comedians today can make an outrageous and even groundbreaking web series or video and yet can continually make boring and cliché Hollywood comedies. Well, my prayers have been answered with “This is the End,” a movie that throws a bunch of celebrities together and lets them play off their own perceived screen personas in a madcap comedy about the end of the world. The Red Band trailer is hysterical.

I’m So Excited – Pedro Almodovar (March in Spain, then hopefully US before long)

It’s been nearly two decades since Pedro Almodovar has made a comedy, and he’s never made one with his two muses, Penelope Cruz and Antonio Banderas, both together. The trailer features three very gay flight attendants in very flamboyant colors singing the Pointer Sisters, so yes, I’m very excited.

The Place Beyond the Pines – Derek Cianfrance (March 29)

I have to keep telling myself this is not “Blue Valentine” meets “Drive.” It stars Ryan Gosling as a motorcycle stunt driver on the run from a cop (Bradley Cooper) in Derek Cianfrance’s follow-up to his indie darling. Both characters however are strong father figures, and this thriller uses that as a powerful theme throughout.

“The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby: His” and “Hers” (TBD)

“The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby” is actually two films, although I’m not sure what either has to do with The Beatles, if anything. One is told from the perspective of the husband in a troubled relationship (James McAvoy) and the other is from the wife’s (Jessica Chastain).

Oldboy – Spike Lee (October 11)

Yes, this is a remake of the IMDB Top 250 darling “Oldboy” by Chan-wook Park, who is ironically also releasing a movie this year, “Stoker.” It stars Samuel L. Jackson, Josh Brolin, “Martha Marcy May Marlene’s” Elizabeth Olsen and “District 9’s” Sharlto Copley.

Captain Phillips – Paul Greengrass (October 11)

I was disappointed with Paul Greengrass’s last film “Green Zone,” so I’m hoping for a return to form in “Captain Phillips.” He’s cast Tom Hanks in the title role as a captain dealing with the first of the Somali pirate hijackings that took place in 2009. The screenplay comes from Billy Ray, director of “Breach” and co-screenwriter of “The Hunger Games.”

“The Monuments Men” – George Clooney (December 20)

“The Monuments Men” will be George Clooney’s fifth film behind the camera. It’s a World War II story about art historians trying to retrieve artwork stolen by the Nazis. It’s rumored to star Daniel Craig, Matt Damon, Cate Blanchett, John Goodman and “The Artist’s” Jean Dujardin. Could be Oscar gold.

Ender’s Game – Gavin Hood (December 1)

“Ender’s Game” is one of my favorite childhood books I have no recollection of, a “Hunger Games” esque story in which kids are trained for intergalactic battle by participating in war games. Author Orson Scott Card was for a very long time hesitant to release the rights to the film, fearing that the movie would have to be very different from the book to be successful. Well, supposedly now it is, and he feels confident about the script. “Ender’s Game” is directed by Gavin Hood and stars Asa Butterfield, Abigail Breslin and Harrison Ford.

The World’s End – Edgar Wright (October 25)

Edgar Wright is returning to his collaboration with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost to create the third film in what’s known as “The Blood and Ice Cream Trilogy.” Despite being yet another comedy about the apocalypse this year, these guys are a tried and true pairing.

Sound City – Dave Grohl (February 1)

Foo Fighters front man Dave Grohl, in his quest to be everywhere at once, has now taken up documentary filmmaking with his debut movie “Sound City.” He’s gathered a huge flock of his rock star friends to discuss the joys of recording at a long forgotten studio called Sound City. The film will premiere at Sundance (and Grohl will be on hand with a performance by the newly formed Sound City Players) but will be available for download shortly thereafter.

A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charles Swan III – Roman Coppola (February 15)

Roman Coppola’s (frequent Wes Anderson collaborator) second film could just be the most bananas comedy of the year, and not just because the movie poster is just one giant banana. Charlie Sheen plays Charles Swan III in this bizarre, surreal comedy starring Jason Schwartzman and Bill Murray.

Dead Man Down – Niels Arden Oplev (March 8)

The trailer looked pretty ho-hum, but Niels Arden Oplev gave me the biggest surprise of the year in his Swedish version of “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.” This English language film actually reunites him with Noomi Rapace in a crime thriller about a woman who seduces a mobster to seek revenge.

Movies you might think I’d be more excited for, but no

“The Great Gatsby,” “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire,” “Oblivion,” “Star Trek Into Darkness,” “Elysium,” “Pacific Rim,” “Sin City: A Dame to Kill For,” “Saving Mr. Banks,” “Oz the Great and Powerful,” “Man of Steel,” “The Wolverine,” “Anchorman: The Legend Continues,” “Iron Man 3,” “Kick-Ass 2,” “Thor: The Dark World,” “The Lone Ranger”

The Best (And Worst) Movies of 2012

Didn’t anyone get the memo that cinema is dead? 2012 came into greatness notoriously late in the year (if not trickling into next year), but the amount of quality that came out of big budget blockbusters, prestigious Oscar bait and critical darlings is too convincing to say that TV continued to dominate the cultural conversation this year. I can be cynical, but I’d rather just celebrate the movies with a generous round up of everything I hope you’re talking about and just waiting to discover.

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1. The Master

Paul Thomas Anderson has me in his control. “The Master” is elegant, ambiguous, malleable and powerful. With Scientology as only the setting, it’s a difficult, dream-like film open to interpretation, but its strongest themes are the power and reach of the human mind and the capabilities of man. Joaquin Phoenix and Phillip Seymour Hoffman in the two best performances of the year are titans at war, one filled with unpredictable rage, repressed sexuality and energy, the other a deafening force of eloquence and conviction. Mihai Malaimare Jr.’s 70mm photography ripples with color and fantasy. Jonny Greenwood’s score pulses with animalistic alacrity. Watching “The Master” and assigning it meaning is a testament to the richness and complexity of mankind.

2. Life of Pi

If “Life of Pi” cannot make you believe in God, it at the very least can provide the faith that there is beauty and excitement in the world. Ang Lee’s innovative use of 3-D places us on an infinite plain of existence, one that has stunning natural beauty, visceral thrills, comedic charms, emotional poignancy and none of the Disney-fied cuteness. Pi’s sea voyage is pure visual poetry that resonates with you on a deeply spiritual level.

3. Moonrise Kingdom

Perhaps no director today has a more distinct visual and tonal style than Wes Anderson, but “Moonrise Kingdom” is his most personal and close to the heart by far. Anderson funnels his love of classical music, the French New Wave and low rent spectacle into a magical film about kids living beyond their age. It finds the beauty of young love in a joyous, colorful and hilarious art house movie that anyone can relate to.

4. Beasts of the Southern Wild

“Benh Zeitlin’s “Beasts of the Southern Wild” is a wondrous, poetic, beautiful film about all the things humans can do when we stop acting like people afraid of nature and start living like brave beasts that become one with the world. It’s about color, light and discovery. It’s about being loved by the world, loving it back and understanding how to truly live. It’s about facing the other beasts of the world, and doing it head on.” (Excerpt from my review)

5. The Kid With a Bike

When a boy is abandoned by his father at an orphanage, he spends months blindly fighting to get back to him while rejecting the love and affection of others. The French film “The Kid With a Bike” is about the attachments we place on the things we love and the unexpected consequences that come of them. The Dardenne brothers’ simple and rugged film digs deep in its grainy and grizzled surface to find the sentimentality within.

6. Skyfall

At 50 years old, James Bond has never looked better. “Skyfall” marks the first time we’ve asked about Bond’s past and questioned his future, but we do so in by far the most exciting and stylish action movie of the year. Roger Deakins’s digital cinematography turns Bond’s fist fights into elegant shadow ballets, and Javier Bardem’s snake-like sexuality and compulsions make for some of the finest screen villainy this century.

7. The Invisible War

Nearly 20 percent of all women who have served in the armed forces are sexually assaulted during their line of duty. That’s the horrifying truth at the heart of “The Invisible War,” a documentary that for that statistic alone is essential viewing for anyone in the military. But more so, Kirby Dick’s film is moving in its unification of women (and men!) who once all considered themselves an army of one. What sacrifices are we really asking our soldiers to make for our country?

8. Lincoln

Steven Spielberg’s “Lincoln” is the stirring American vision we deserve. A remarkably authentic account of the effort to abolish slavery, the story of “Lincoln” is a war of words, not worlds, yet remains as intense and rousing as any action movie this year. Daniel Day-Lewis melts into the visage of our 16th President while making the role all his own, and the monumental performances of Tommy Lee Jones and Sally Field anchor the best screen ensemble of the year.

9. Looper

Destined to be an action sci-fi classic, “Looper” accomplishes the impossible by being cool and accessible while staying dark and emotional. Director Rian Johnson makes the time travel conceit something other than an exercise in futility, devoting more attention to the film’s cocky, narcissistic heroes (Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Bruce Willis, his best dramatic work since “The Sixth Sense”), who are really both the same person. “Looper” is even a powerful forewarning of our civilization’s decline into more and more crime and violence, a nuance that along with its lens flares, canted angles and impressive visual effects, make it refreshingly modern.

10. Rust and Bone

“Rust and Bone” is a powerful and aggressively emotional film about people who are incomplete. A French romance of imperfect characters who are mending physically but damaged emotionally, Marion Cotillard and Matthias Schoenaerts give tough, often unsentimental performances that are not without humor and heart. Director Jacques Audiard (“A Prophet”) finds a mix between moments and visuals that feel stark and lonely, such as a lengthy wide shot of Cotillard lying in a hospital bed, and those between Cotillard and a whale, that are elegant statements of forming a bond.

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Honorable Mention – The Turin Horse

Looking and feeling the way “The Turin Horse” does, one would believe it is a tortured, yet essential classic belonging to another time. But it came out in 2012 and may be the last film from the elderly Hungarian master Bela Tarr. It is bleak and draining beyond belief. In black and white and with only 30 shots, it is an excruciating sit. It is almost completely empty of activity, plot or dialogue. It will make you sick at the sight of baked potatoes. And by the end of it, you will feel as if the world is ending. Yet to call it anything other than spellbinding is a gross understatement.

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11th Place Continue reading “The Best (And Worst) Movies of 2012”

The Best Albums of 2012

Oh, I’m sorry. Did you expect me to write a list about movies? Well, it’s my blog and I can do what I want. And there’s no way I’m making a Top 10 list until I see “Django Unchained” on Christmas Day anyway, so you’re just going to have to wait.

But despite never having done one before, I really wanted to make a Top 10 list of my favorite albums of the year. I listened to more music, went to more concerts and read more music criticism this year than any year in the past, and likely several years combined. I wanted to share the music I’ve discovered this year, but I also wanted to test myself in writing about music, which as several friends have previously informed me, I shouldn’t be ashamed of.

Does that make me an expert? No. It’s almost a guarantee that a few of the albums I have here will appear on my list exclusively. Some of those that are universally loved don’t really come into my wheelhouse (for what it’s worth, I enjoyed “Channel Orange”), and although I listened to enough to make a decent list, I still have a long way to go.

Almost all of these albums are artists I discovered in the last year alone, ousting out albums by long time favorites like Bruce Springsteen, Jack White, The Killers, Silversun Pickups, Smashing Pumpkins, St. Vincent and David Byrne, Aerosmith (did you honestly listen to this? I didn’t), two by Neil Young and two (so far) by Green Day that didn’t register with me as strongly.

What I did come up with however shows that although I’m mostly a rock guy, I cling to music that is arty, dreamy, poppy and heavy. Hopefully next year I can claim to have a list as diverse. Continue reading “The Best Albums of 2012”

Fall Movie Preview 2012

My approach to these movie previews seems to change about every season along with my anticipation for certain Oscar bait and my ultimate exhaustion with the summer. But I did manage to scrape together another 43 movies that are likely worth my time and yours, that is until I actually see them and change my mind.

Top 10 Movies I’m Excited For

The Master – September 14

“The Master” seems to carry a greater level of mystique than any movie slated to arrive this fall. Paul Thomas Anderson’s follow-up to “There Will Be Blood” has already covertly premiered around the country in 70mm (a format I’ll sadly probably never see it in), and although it’s clear the movie is about a PTSD Navy soldier meeting and inspiring an L. Ron Hubbard type, does anyone really know what it’s about or how it feels yet? The movie looks damned gorgeous, Joaquin Phoenix looks brilliant, and as perfect as “TWBB” is, PTA needed Phillip Seymour Hoffman back in his life.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower – September 21

The Millennial Generation needs a great teen movie that can be on par with something like “The Breakfast Club.” What better than the cult-teen novel “The Perks of Being a Wallflower,” actually written and directed by the author himself? Emma Watson’s British and my age, but I don’t see any reason why I wouldn’t adore her as a 16-year-old American. And it’ll be interesting to see “We Need to Talk About Kevin’s” Ezra Miller tackle a role that isn’t so… twisted, for lack of a better word.

Argo – October 12

Ben Affleck is quickly turning into a significant American director with how much award pedigree he’s earned with just two films. “Argo” could be his best yet. First reports from Telluride said that Affleck’s real life spy thriller about movie making is terrifically rousing and has big appeal.

Skyfall – November 9

Sometimes a Bond movie is only as good as its villain, and “Skyfall” has two great ones in Ralph Fiennes and Javier Bardem. Sam Mendes directing always sounded like something of a stretch to me, and the writer, John Logan (“Hugo,” Rango,” “Sweeney Todd,” “The Aviator,” “Gladiator”), is too. But hopefully it can’t be more forgettable than “Quantum of Solace.”

Lincoln – November 9

Oh, you really think other movies will win Oscars this year? That’s cute. “Lincoln” has a grand total of two screenshots made public so far, and Daniel Day-Lewis’s chances couldn’t go up if he dropped dead tomorrow. The remainder of Steven Spielberg’s cast to be outshined by Day-Lewis includes fellow hyphenated actor Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Tommy Lee Jones, Jackie Earle Haley, James Spader, David Strathairn, Sally Field, John Hawks, Michael Stuhlbarg… the list goes on and on. He’s casting the entire friggin’ Civil War here.

Rust & Bone – November 16

Marion Cotillard could be sexy and beautiful even if she was a paraplegic killer whale trainer, which she is in “Rust & Bone.” This movie by Jacques Audiard (“A Prophet”) was the runner up at this year’s Cannes, and although it’s a French art film, it should have big, romantic, steamy appeal for wide audiences.

Les Miserables – December 14

“Les Miserables” remains the best musical I’ve seen onstage, and it’s a shame there really hasn’t been a properly decent adaptation of it. Tom Hooper’s (“The King’s Speech”) sweeping vista cinematography and intricate set dressing should fit the theatrical bill perfectly. And I’m aware that Anne Hathaway, Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe can all sing, but I’d love to finally see them do it.

Zero Dark Thirty – December 19

“The Hurt Locker” team couldn’t have picked a better subject to serve as a follow-up than the hunt for Osama Bin Laden. There’s some appropriate mystery surrounding this film as well, but the film is supposed to be fairly non-partisan. “Zero Dark Thirty” was made for only $30 million, so it could be yet another stirringly made war indie worthy of an Oscar.

Amour – December 21

Michael Haneke is currently at the top of his game. “Amour” won this year’s Palme D’Or, as did his previous film “The White Ribbon,” so this film is hotly anticipated for the art house crowd. It’s the story of two elderly music teachers, one of whom suffers a stroke and struggles to recognize her partner. Its two stars, Jean-Louis Trintignant and Emmanuelle Riva, have long histories in the French New Wave.

Django Unchained – December 25

The D is silent. It’s about damned time Quentin Tarantino made a Western. He’s been making movies that felt like them for so long, and now he’s made a movie that’s appropriately revenge-bent and seemingly awesome. Leonardo DiCaprio should work with just about every great director living today, but I’m glad he took time out of his work with Marty to play a racist Southern plantation owner. And God knows Christoph Waltz has been one of my favorite newcomers since “Inglorious Basterds.” This’ll make my Christmas Day. Continue reading “Fall Movie Preview 2012”

My Best (and Favorite) Movies of All Time

These are my 10 “Best” movies of all time, along with my 10 “Favorite” movies ever.

Any critic voting in the Sight and Sound poll that was announced yesterday (my coverage here if you care to compare lists) will tell you how impossibly difficult it is to select 10 films as the best of all time. Occurring every 10 years since 1952, this is really the only list that matters. They have to select with their minds and their hearts, and the two don’t always coincide. If you’ve seen all the masterpieces, how do you choose between all that is perfect? And how would you like to be the critic who finally displaced “Citizen Kane” as the best movie of all time?

I don’t have nearly as much pressure on my head (not yet), but it hasn’t stopped some of my friends from asking what are my all time favorites.

I tend to dodge the question (often pretentiously, I might add). “Well, how do you rank works of art anyway?” “Oh, you probably haven’t heard of them.” “I’ve just seen so much that it’s so hard to choose.” And then I’ll say something about how I’ve seen the Harry Potter movies a lot because they’re always on HBO and I have a sister with no qualms of re-watching stuff, so maybe those could be called some of my “favorites.”

Often, I don’t even like the word “favorite.” “Best” and “favorite” usually go hand in hand. If I called “Drive” the best movie of 2011, it’s because it’s the one I most want to see again AND because it’s the most important/best made/critic-y jargon bullshit.

There’s also the possibility that I just haven’t seen enough films. In fact, I know I haven’t seen enough. One day decades from now when my Excel spreadsheet of classic films to watch is completely marked up with yellow highlights, when I’ve written and read all I can about them and am looking back on my entire life of watching movies as opposed to looking forward to what’s coming out this Friday, then maybe I’ll make a decent list.

So for all those reasons and more, I’ve never officially made public what are my all time picks for best movies ever. I’ve always had titles in mind, but they’ve never been put on paper like this. It’s damned hard to do.

But I’ll concede that in this instant, “best” does not mean “favorite.” I’m not going to lie and pretend that some obscure foreign movie I’ve seen once two years ago means more to me than something I’ve seen dozens of times since I was a kid. At the same time, that movie I know by heart is probably not even in the same conversation technically or historically as that obscure foreign film.

It’s why I’ve decided to provide TWO lists. One has the movies I would call the most powerful and most significant movies ever made. The other has the titles that I could never forget. They define me as a critic and a person. Continue reading “My Best (and Favorite) Movies of All Time”

2012 Sight and Sound Poll Announced

“Vertigo” has now been named the #1 film over “Citizen Kane” in the 2012 Sight and Sound Critics’ Poll.

For 50 years, “Citizen Kane” has sat alone as the greatest film of all time, much like its title character locked away in a giant palace, untouched.

Now, a giant has toppled.

Alfred Hitchcock’s “Vertigo” has bested “Citizen Kane” as the number one film ever made in the Sight and Sound Poll, a list organized by Sight and Sound magazine and voted on by critics and writers from around the world.

Roger Ebert calls the list essentially the only film poll that matters, and it is such because it has been conducted every 10 years since 1952 and surveys the best of the best in film.

Citizen Kane has been number 1 since 1962 when it overcame Vittorio De Sica’s “Bicycle Thieves,” the reigning champ from 10 years prior. Since then, “Vertigo” has been on every list since 1972, climbing to as high as number 2 in 2002. This year, “Vertigo” received 191 votes from its 847 participants, dwarfing “Kane’s” 151.

This year’s full list is as follows.

  1. “Vertigo” – Alfred Hitchcock, 1958
  2. “Citizen Kane” – Orson Welles, 1941
  3. “Tokyo Story” – Yasujiro Ozu, 1953
  4. “The Rules of the Game” – Jean Renoir, 1939
  5. “Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans” – F.W. Murnau, 1927
  6. “2001: A Space Odyssey” – Stanley Kubrick, 1968
  7. “The Searchers” – John Ford, 1956
  8. “Man With a Movie Camera” – Dziga Vertov, 1929
  9. “The Passion of Joan of Arc” – Carl Theodore Dreyer, 1927
  10. “8 1/2” – Federico Fellini, 1963 Continue reading “2012 Sight and Sound Poll Announced”

Summer Movie Preview 2012: 40 Movies Worth Talking About

“Prometheus,” “The Dark Knight Rises” and “Brave” are all on my list of the most anticipated movies of Summer 2012.

I’m not going to lie; 2012 has been a surprisingly good year for movies thus far. I’m behind on the indie and foreign critical darlings that may show up on a few best of the year lists come December, but if this trend continues for the mainstream fare, we might just have one hell of a summer.

And yet, there are no doubt movies that frankly look terrible. It would be easy to just rave about the few I’m genuinely interested in, but I can’t exactly hold my tongue on all of them.

So just like I did last year, this is not a summer preview but a list of movies I’m actually interested in talking about.

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Prometheus

Top 10 movies I’m pretty damned excited for this summer

Moonrise Kingdom (May 25)

Wes Anderson’s comeback live action film after the wonderful “Fantastic Mr. Fox” would normally have me rolling my eyes when I see how plainly Wes Anderson the trailer for “Moonrise Kingdom” is. But the cast additions of Bruce Willis, Edward Norton and Tilda Swinton to Anderson’s go-to lineup are what are so invigorating. If there’s one thing that concerns me, it has Anderson repairing with screenwriter Roman Coppola, who also did “The Darjeeling Limited,” possibly my least favorite Anderson film.

Prometheus (June 8)

I’ve seen more viral trailers and TV spots than I know what to do with for “Prometheus,” and yet still the story remains ambiguous as to its ties to Ridley Scott’s own masterpiece, “Alien.” Scott is one of those legacy directors that are still churning out great product on a regular basis today, and this looks like his best in a long time. The cast has both massive nerd and cinephile cred, and it happens to come out on my birthday.

Safety Not Guaranteed (June 8)

It’ll be interesting to see Aubrey Plaza in a leading role for a change, and Mark Duplass looks like her perfect match in this quirky indie comedy where a crazed Duplass tries to enlist her to travel back with him in time.

To Rome, With Love (June 22)

Woody Allen is one of the few directors today who can get anyone he wants in his movies. His latest film rounds out his European holiday that has taken him to Barcelona, Paris, and now Rome, and he’s brought with him Alec Baldwin, Roberto Benigni, Jesse Eisenberg, Penelope Cruz, Ellen Page and Greta Gerwig. This also marks the first time Allen has acted since 2006’s “Scoop,” which alone should generate some buzz. But some mixed reviews regarding Allen’s superficial treatment of Italians have me worried we may be back in the hole of his shrug-worthy films.

Brave (June 22)

More interesting than Pixar having its first dud in “Cars 2” is Pixar having its first female lead in “Brave,” the Medieval story of a princess (although she doesn’t yet seem like a blatantly marketed Disney princess) who is adept with a bow and casts a spell to change her fate. Pixar is the best for a reason, and a part of me bets this’ll snare that “Hunger Games” audience too.

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (June 22)

It’s not easy to make the apocalypse funny without being completely lewd and ridiculous, and Steve Carell seems like the perfect casting choice to do that. I can already tell he’s got great chemistry with Keira Knightly, and Patton Oswalt in anything is a sure thing. It’s directed and written by Lorene Scafaria, whose last project was “Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist,” which I didn’t much care for though.

Beasts of the Southern Wild (June 27)

Easily the most obscure title in my most anticipated list is this visionary indie that won the Grand Jury Prize at Sundance this year. It’s a post-apocalyptic story about a girl and her father living in a bathtub on the open sea and the girl’s psychological ramifications that lead her to believe she’s responsible for all of the destruction. “Beasts of the Southern Wild” looks plain beautiful too.

Magic Mike (June 29)

I LIKE CHANNING TATUM’S PECS! I mean, Steven Soderbergh has been on a roll lately. Both “Contagion” and “Haywire” were off the beat and path, and this film, about the story of a male stripper, is likewise a jock strap of a different color. If it is good, Soderbergh will have more great movies in one calendar year than any director I can think of.

The Dark Knight Rises (July 20)

Yes. Yes. Yes. No, it’s not shot in Chicago anymore, but… Yes. At the very least I’m hoping everyone forgets about seeing “The Avengers” after this.

Ruby Sparks (July 25)

“Little Miss Sunshine” is one of those movies I can instantly get caught up watching if I see it on, and Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris finally putting out another film has just made my day. Paul Dano is a struggling writer who falls in love with the female character he’s writing, and they form a relationship when she actually appears out of thin air. Looks hilarious and adorable.

The Bourne Legacy

Yeah, I’d see it

Dark Shadows (May 11)

People have been ragging on Tim Burton for doing nothing but adaptations of already creepy, weird and quirky stuff (me included), and not many people would’ve said adapting a soap opera was a good idea, but the idea of Chloe Moretz working with Tim Burton, even in a small part, seems strangely perfect to me.

The Dictator (May 16)

“Borat” hasn’t aged well, and “The Dictator” isn’t even a prankumentary, but Sacha Baron Cohen put Ryan Seacrest in his place Oscar night when he dumped Kim Jong Il’s ashes on him. I’m sold.

The Intouchables (May 25)

I’m calling it right now: “The Intouchables” has Oscar bait written all over it. It’s the second highest grossing foreign film behind “The Passion of the Christ” and going strong, and it’s the saccharine story of a black man from the streets hired to care for a wealthy paraplegic. It looks like it has “Driving Miss Daisy” and “The Bucket List” rolled into one, in which case it could be absolutely terrible.

Oslo, August 31 (May 25)

All I know about this Norwegian film is that it was a Cannes competitor in 2011 and it’s one of the sleeper foreign art house movies to hit the states this summer. It’s the day in the life of a recovering drug addict and looks visually stunning.

Lola Versus (June 8)

Just about every critic officially fell in love with Greta Gerwig in “Greenberg” when she seemed like the most naturally attractive woman working in the movies today. She doesn’t look like a movie star; she looks like your girlfriend. But this movie about her bouncing back from a bad breakup is going to try and make her a movie star anyway.

Take this Waltz (June 29)

Like the “Little Miss Sunshine” team, this is another indie romance from a director who’s been on a long hiatus, Sarah Polley. Her last feature, “Away From Her,” is nothing like the young-love story of “Take This Waltz” but will likely share its spirit. Michelle Williams, Seth Rogen, Luke Kirby and Sarah Silverman star.

Your Sister’s Sister (June 29)

Mark Duplass is literally in everything this year. This mumblecore romance is not from him and his brother but from his previous director on “Humpday.” Duplass’s best friend Emily Blunt sends him away for a recovery weekend with her sister, played by Rosemary DeWitt, and a steamy hipster love triangle forms in the middle.

The Amazing Spiderman (July 3)

A friend of mine wondered how Andrew Garfield’s hair would possibly fit under Spiderman’s skin tight mask, but why ask questions when this is really just a remake of the original “Spiderman” with a new villain and wallpaper. I am curious to see Marc Webb’s follow-up to “500 Days of Summer” though.

The Bourne Legacy (August 3)

Matt Damon’s Jason Bourne was possibly the coolest action hero of the last decade. To replace him would’ve been a mistake. So new director Tony Gilroy, the man behind all the previous Bourne screenplays, has crafted a new story (not based on a novel) and a new hero, Agent Aaron Ross (Jeremy Renner). He’ll be interacting with all the existing Bourne characters in events before and after those of the trilogy. This and “The Avengers” will turn Renner into a bona fide star, and I’d pay good money to see Edward Norton in a villain role.

Lawless (August 31)

I would say “Lawless” is Director John Hillcoat’s feature film version of “Boardwalk Empire,” but this film has been in production hell for so long that Shia Labeouf would’ve probably been cast as Jimmy Darmody had people seen this film sooner. In fact, even this release date is tentative, so you may be going cold turkey for a little while longer.

Rock of Ages
Rock of Ages

I’m not really expecting much, but I guess it could be alright

Hick (May 11)

At this point, I’d pay to see Chloe Moretz in anything. I think she’s a terrific young actress. I haven’t heard of Director Derick Martini, but he’s notorious for being a filmmaker who earns bad press. “Hick” already has a 5.1 on IMDb. Ouch.

God Bless America (May 11)

This movie looks really bad spirited. Comedian turned filmmaker Bobcat Goldthwait, who directed Robin Williams in “World’s Greatest Dad,” directs, and he’s made a story that a lot of people even more cynical than I may relate to and find hilarious. A man wanting to kill himself because of all the horrible people he sees on TV instead chooses to kill all the people he feels deserve to die, and he makes a teenage girl his accomplice. Fun.

Hysteria (May 18)

Oh boy! It’s “Love and Other Drugs” for the 19th Century! It’s the period drama of a doctor who invents the vibrator, or here called, “The Feather Duster.”

Rock of Ages (June 15)

Do people actually like ‘80s hair metal? The jukebox musical soundtrack for the very successful Broadway production of the same name looks more like a Buzz Ballads track listing than something hip and cool. This is director Adam Shankman’s first musical since “Hairspray,” a casting choice that makes more sense than Tom Cruise singing.

Savages (July 6)

Even from the trailer, “Savages” looks cliché, ridiculous and visually exhausting, just like Oliver Stone’s last mess of a movie, “Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps.” Stone’s been off the deep end as a filmmaker for a number of years, and I’d be lying if I said I’m still curious to see what he does next.

Ted (July 13)

Is having animals or things that shouldn’t be able to talk act normally in the world just Seth Macfarlane’s thing? The teddy bear Ted has a voice that’s a blend of Peter and Brian, and I don’t need any movie that feels, sounds or looks anything like “Family Guy.”

Neighborhood Watch (July 27)

Could “Neighborhood Watch” be the new classic teen comedy that’ll make an obscene amount of money? Maybe. Lonely Island’s Akiva Schaffer directs. At least it’s not “Paul Blart 2.”

Total Recall (August 3)

I somehow have fond memories of watching the original, absolutely balls to the wall ridiculous and campy “Total Recall” when I was younger. This version by the director of all the “Underworld” films potentially looks no fun at all.

The Campaign (August 10)

No trailer for this yet, but how are we going to deal with two manchilds, Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis, in the same movie? Director Jay Roach finally looks to be combining his penchant for directing cerebral, HBO political dramas (“Game Change,” “Recount”) with his penchant for stupid comedies (“Austin Powers,” “Dinner for Schmucks”)

Hope Springs (August 10)

I said that Meryl Streep really needs to stop doing characters and be a normal woman again in a movie. But you know what? She really needs to stop working with awful directors like Phyllida Lloyd and the man behind “Hope Springs,” David Frankel.

The Odd Life of Timothy Green (August 15)

I really must be a sucker for indie bait from good directors, because the premise of “The Odd Life of Timothy Green” actually has a lot in common with “Ruby Sparks,” only this whole movie has been Disneyfied. The trailer has at least 20 seconds of shots of a kid with arms wide open beaconing the heavens, which is hilarious.

Sparkle (August 17)

“Sparkle” is basically “Dreamgirls,” only a remake and not based on a real life Motown group. The cast features a bunch of R&B pop idols of today, like Jordin Sparks and Cee Lo, but its real pull is the new work of the late Whitney Houston.

Premium Rush (August 24)

Did you know Joseph Gordon Levitt actually crashed through a taxicab rear window and got 31 stitches in his arm while filming this movie? If an action movie with a bike messenger is really as interesting as this behind the scenes video is, then I’d see it.


 

Battleship

Oh dear god

Battleship (May 18)

It’s ridiculous to say “Battleship” is based on a board game, like “Pirates of the Caribbean” is really “based” on a Disney World ride. It probably would’ve made immensely more money if it was just called “Navy Explosion.” Regardless, it still looks like a worthless “Transformers” retread.

Men in Black III (May 25)

Are the original “Men in Black” movies actually good? What was the last genuinely good thing Will Smith’s been in? Has a movie other than “Toy Story 3” with a “3” on the end of it ever been good?

Snow White and the Huntsman (June 1)

Oh yeah, screw “Mirror Mirror,” because we need a dark version of “Snow White.” That Disney cartoon was really getting dated. Better just make it into “Lord of the Rings” and cast Bella Swan and Thor.

That’s My Boy (June 15)

Ugh. Adam Sandler, go away. And why did you have to take Andy Samberg with you?

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (June 22)

I’ve never seen a trailer of this movie where people didn’t laugh their heads off at the title. But it’s based on a graphic novel and done by the guy who did “Wanted!” Yeah… and?

G.I. Joe: Retaliation (June 29)

See, I don’t know why more ninjas don’t have sword fights on the sides of cliffs. It makes perfect sense.

The Expendables 2 (August 17)

As I was watching trailers before “The Avengers,” “The Expendables 2” was the only one that didn’t have a ridiculous amount of CGI and was actually grounded on planet Earth. It almost makes me want to see how ridiculous it is for that very reason, but then, no.

Oh, and by the way, I already saw “The Avengers.”

Oscars 2012: Will Win (Part 2)

See my picks for the remaining categories along with analysis, here.

Movies are an art, not a science. And yet The Academy, save for a few eye rolling hiccups each year, operates like clockwork. Predicting the winners at the Oscars is as simple as playing the horses at the track, so here’s your betting form for the big race on Sunday night.

Best Picture

The Artist: 80%

I was once in the camp that a silent film, no matter how good, could never win Best Picture in 2012. But now my odds hardly reflect how one-sided this race has become. Even though it’s a French film, “The Artist” is universal. It’s a crowd-pleaser, a star-maker, and the only Best Picture nominee filmed in Los Angeles. From the Golden Globe to the Director’s Guild to the surprising BAFTA win, the question is not if “The Artist” will win but how many Oscars it will win.

Hugo: 8%

Actually trumping “The Artist” in nominations and taking its cinematic nostalgia trip one step further, “Hugo” and a sweep of technical awards may propel this film to a Best Picture win.

The Descendants: 7%

Be it “The Social Network” or “Up in the Air,” critics and Academy voters respond to the 21st Century darling of the year, and Alexander Payne’s “The Descendants” is that film.

Midnight in Paris: 1.5%

The Help: 1%

The Tree of Life: 1%

Moneyball: .75%

War Horse: .5%

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close: .25%

To address the remaining nominees, I don’t want to say they don’t stand a chance, but who am I kidding? If you had five nominees this year, your contenders outside of the top three would be “Midnight in Paris” and “The Help,” maybe “Moneyball.” So that says something for their chances. The other completely outside chance would be “The Tree of Life,” an important film that a number of critics have made a case for to win the Oscar based on how significant such a victory would seem in terms of cinema history. I don’t want to make any sort of case for “Extremely Loud,” but being here was its first big surprise, and winning could be its second. Continue reading “Oscars 2012: Will Win (Part 2)”

Oscars 2012: Will Win (Part 1)

See my remaining picks in the major categories here.

Movies are an art, not a science. And yet The Academy, save for a few eye rolling hiccups each year, operates like clockwork. Predicting the winners at the Oscars is as simple as playing the horses at the track, so here’s your betting form for the big race on Sunday night.

Best Adapted Screenplay

The Descendants: 40%

“The Descendants” is bound to win something, and because it’s a screenplay that greatly differs from the source material and comes from a director and screenwriter who hasn’t put out a movie in six years, it’s looking more and more certain.

Moneyball: 30%

“Moneyball” is a serious contender in this category for the way in which it adapts a fact based, nonfiction book into a story with likeable and pathos filled characters. It also comes from last year’s winner, Aaron Sorkin and other Oscar fave Steven Zallian.

Hugo: 20%

“Hugo” isn’t exactly a writer’s movie, but Brian Selznick’s children’s book is surprisingly rich and colorful, and somehow John Logan tops it.

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy: 5%

The Ides of March: 5% Continue reading “Oscars 2012: Will Win (Part 1)”

The Anti-Oscars

In “The Anti-Oscars,” I make a list of the Best Movies and Performances of the Year that don’t stand a chance at getting nominated.

This article will not help you win your Oscar pool.

On this Oscar Nomination ballot, you will not find any Streeps, Clooneys, Plummers or Spielbergs.

No, this is the Anti-Oscars! This is the opposite of what will happen when nominations are announced on Tuesday, January 24.

I’ve made picks in five of the six major categories, but while these certainly don’t reflect what will happen, they aren’t even necessarily what I think should happen. The Academy gets some things right some of the time.

Rather this list is my personal ballot dedicated to the not-even-out-of-the-gate contenders that were marvelous in 2011 but for whatever reason will not receive the attention they deserve at the biggest award ceremony of the year.

I’ll also use this space to discuss why they are not in the race and what that means for the actual contenders. So if any of these names are in your predictions, rethink your decisions now, and watch me eat my words when I predict the real ballot next week.

 

Best Picture

  • Drive
  • Beginners
  • Super 8
  • Incendies
  • The Skin I Live In
  • Certified Copy
  • Weekend
  • Melancholia

If there’s one thing the Best Picture hopeful lineup is missing, it’s a good dose of darkness. Is “Moneyball” really the darkest movie this year’s Oscars have to offer? My list, which conveniently resembles all eight films in my Top 10 list not solid contenders for nomination (the other two being “Midnight in Paris” and “Hugo”), shows a much more even split of heavy and lighter entertainment. Continue reading “The Anti-Oscars”